Bound To Happen
by lovewinter
Summary: Back before everything started. Just an attempt to understand what drove Jack and Sam together. JS
1. Chapter 1

Title: BOUND TO HAPPEN

Rating: T  
Keywords: J/S  
Timeline: before the affair  
Summary: what happened between Jack and Sam before the affair  
Disclaimer: these aren't my characters, but I love them

A.N.: Huge thanks to all who helped me through this adventure. English is not my language, without Diane this story wouldn't be here. She is great! And huge thanks to Sharon, who helped me during my middle story crisis and led me to the end.

**BOUND TO HAPPEN**

Prologue: In the Beginning

Jack Malone was attracted by his new agent, from the beginning. Who wouldn't be? She was really attractive, young, full of life, strong, self-assured, and fearless.

Samantha Spade came directly from Quantico and his colleague, Vivian Johnson, asked him if two rookies in six months would be too much.

At first, he couldn't find a right answer. He thought maybe Samantha's good looks could have confused him, but no, they needed another agent. She was the right choice. She went along well with the team, she was very driven, he appreciated her toughness and sensitivity, and she truly cared about the missing persons they investigated.

He paired himself with her a lot, and Danny Taylor, the other new agent, with Vivian, with the excuse of pairing the senior agents with the least-experienced rookies, but soon it became normal. Samantha and Danny believed it was because Jack wanted both a man and a woman in interviews, but Vivian, who had known Jack for years in and out of work, knew better and asked several times if continuing was a wise choice.

There were many alarms but Jack decided to ignore them. The new young agent didn't seem to have a life outside work, only a few dates. Danny loved to tease her about the poor guy who fell in her web.

When their caseload increased, Jack and Samantha often stayed late at work and Vivian's phone started to ring. Maria, Jack's wife, wanted to know why her husband wasn't at home, especially since Vivian herself was. Vivian didn't have any proof, but felt in her gut that something was going on between Jack and Samantha. At work, they were always very professional, but there was something else, a strange light in their eyes, the easy banter, looks...almost as if they were flirting, a lot.

Jack's marriage was at a rough point. He and Maria were both working full time with two young daughters. Maria was a lawyer who loved her job, her daughters and probably Jack.

The situation wasn't simple. She was stressed. She felt like she was a single mother. Jack was with his work more than with her. He had been this type of man before their youngest daughter was born, but it was more noticeable now. He had his own unit, with two new agents to be trained, and the fact that one of them was a terrific young blonde didn't help Maria's attitude.

Jack never talked about his cases at home and Maria was grateful, but this choice created a crack in their relationship that years could only make wider.

During their long hours together working on cases, Jack and Samantha talked a lot, discovering what the other liked and disliked, when to talk or be silent, when a touch was needed...Jack started to open up without being conscious of it and Samantha soon became 'Sam'.

Jack Malone, an interesting man nearing forty, was falling hard for a blonde agent almost half his age.

Samantha Spade could feel the walls falling when she was with him. She felt safe and they understood each other, but something was nagging at her. Each case, each night, each meal together became her desire and hid a request for more than she was sure they would ever satisfy. For the first time in her life, she feared to make the first move with a man and, at the same time, feared not to.

All that they shared during their time together, lead them in front of her apartment door one night as they returned from a particularly sad case in Albany.

"_It's still early. Do you want some coffee?_"

That night wasn't the beginning of their affair. It would not officially start for another year.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: And Autumn Became Spring

Jack didn't understand what was happening. Samantha, one of his subordinates, had just invited him into her home and he had agreed. His family was waiting for himbut he was sitting on Sam's couch with a coffee in his hands and he didn't want to be anywhere else.

Was that right?

They weren't doing anything wrong; it was a tough case that ended with a corpse. The woman was dead even before they were called. Three days of useless investigations and then the trip to Albany that had lead to the macabre discovery.  
Bad day, very bad day.

At home Maria was preparing Hanna's 6th birthday party and she needed his help but he wasn't in the mood for smiles, festoonsand cakes. Sam had offered him a way to provide some distance from the day events and he had desperately needed it.

Samantha had made her decision. It was time to trust men again, this particular man whom she had grown to know during the previous year. Jack was married, she was safe.  
He wasn't looking for a physical relationship, otherwise he would have made it clear before.  
She had let him into her private life, now the ball was in his court.

When he arrived home, Maria was angry; he failed her another time. He was tired of their continuous arguments; she seemed not to understand that he didn't have a 9 to 5 job.  
He had always separated his work from his family, and now after years, he couldn't ask his wife to understand that his job left a chip on his shoulders he couldn't shake off alone anymore.

Every day at work was harder and going home without being able to close off his mind was becoming impossible. Some nights he stayed at the office just to avoid another fight.

It was during one of these nights that Samantha invited herself into his office with a pizza and two sodas. 'Don't look at me as if I'm crazy. You have to eat something, so do I, so why should we eat alone?'

It soon became a normal routine when he stayed at the office. The rules were no work, no family, only the two of them. Samantha seemed to be the only one who could ease his pain, they could connect. He was able to read through her façade and she could sense his deep loneliness and understand his desire for perfection in his life and the inevitable sense of failure resulting from it.

Vivian had always helped Jack with his wife, knowing how difficult it could be having a family in their job, but lately she was less available. She knew Jack from their beginning at the FBI's missing person unit and was worried: something wasn't right because Jack spoke about his daughters but she didn't remember him mentioning Maria.

When she heard Jack call the young woman Sam, Vivian decided she had to talk with him.

"Jack, is there something wrong at home? You know, we are friends".

"It's nothing. Just a misunderstanding. But, thanks, Viv. By the way, I am on call this weekend, so enjoy your family". He left without waiting for an answer.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: Free Will

Jack asked himself why he had decided to be on call for the following weekend. Was it an impulsive choice triggered by Vivian's question about his marriage or the fact that Samantha was on call too?  
At this point he wasn't sure anymore.

The Saturday before he had gone Christmas shopping for some personal gifts for his girls. He bought a gold chain with a little heart for Hanna, a silver carillon for Kate and a pair of pearl earrings for Maria… and a slight gold necklace for... Samantha.  
It had been natural. He saw the chain and without thinking, he bought it.  
He had followed an impulse. It was only when he was coming back home did he realize the real meaning of his action.

_Had __Sam become 'one of his girls'? _

Now, he had that velvet box in his bottom desk drawer.

That Saturday morning a call from Van Doran woke him at 6:30 a.m. William Dobson, 21 years, had disappeared after a fight with his father the night before.  
Jack phoned Samantha and she told him she would be there in 45 minutes.  
Interviewing the father, they discovered that his wife had committed suicide three months before and William had found the body. He changed after that event. He left his studies. He didn't go out with his friends anymore, and passed the time in his room with the computer.  
The two agents went to the boy's room and Samantha sat at his desk and turned on the computer.

Jack was looking for some sign. On the wall there was only a blackboard with some childish drawings, on the bookcase only school books and some old comics, and on his bed table a picture of him with his mother. A sense of restlessness took him; that boy needed to be found very quickly.

Samantha woke him from his thoughts: "Jack, take a look. This boy was doing 'interesting' searches… do you think we could be too late?"  
On the screen there was a list of sites describing several ways of killing yourself.

"He's been missing since yesterday, so if he wanted to kill himself, he would have had plenty of time. Check his mail. Maybe he was in touch with someone; maybe he had a girlfriend..."

Samantha might be reading too much in his tone, but his voice seemed to hide anxiety mixed with fear. She went on with the task, momentarily putting aside her concern and she found a couple of emails sent the night before: one to a certain Claire and the other to his father. They were very similar, they were goodbye letters.  
This boy was seriously depressed; he was planning his suicide and had sent two goodbye letters. What were the chances that he was still alive? Even Samantha was losing hope.

While Jack went to interview Claire, Samantha returned to the office to continue her search through William's files.  
How could they find a boy who cut himself off from the world?  
He left his cell phone at home, took his car, and disappeared. They only know that he was heading out of the city because he said so in his emails. But, where was he going and how did he plan to kill himself?

Claire told Jack that William had spoken with her about a cabin where his family went when he was a child. Jack asked Samantha to check into it and then decided to go there with her.

They found the young man in the cabin. He had taken some pills and then had cut his wrists. There was a lot of blood on the floor, and his pulse was very weak.  
The paramedics took him away barely alive.

Samantha didn't believe that they would find him alive, and she was satisfied that William would have another chance at life. She looked at Jack, wanting to ask if he'd like to eat something before heading to the office and… she was shocked: Jack Malone was crying. Not sobbing, but it was clear to an expert of dry tears like herself that he was definitely crying. He was bent against the car trunk, face in his hands.

She didn't know what to do. Maybe it would have been better to ignore him. But something told her otherwise. She went near him and put her hand on his arm: "Jack, look at me. Please, Jack…". Her voice pleading, she asked, "What is it?".  
Samantha was trying to keep her voice soothing. She wanted her boss to open up to her.

Jack was emotionally exhausted. It was since they had discovered that the mother had killed herself and that the boy was thinking about doing the same that he was struggling to keep his feelings under control. Now, as the tension loosened, he couldn't restrain his emotion anymore. His memories became vivid and pain oppressed his chest. A delicate hand touched his arm and a concerned voice made him look up.  
Sam's worried face was looking directly at him. He couldn't reveal to her something that his wife didn't even know. After his mother's suicide he made a feeble attempt to do the same. When, as a teenager, he deliberately crashed his car. Perhaps one day he would confide in Sam…when the time was right.  
He squeezed her hand and looked at her; his eyes were pleading her to not ask.

Sam smiled and told him that it was okay, then she pulled her hand away and walked toward the driver's seat.

When Jack arrived at home, his wife was ready for another fight because she had to look for the last Christmas gifts alone.  
He would have wanted to find comfort in Maria, share with her his pain. Instead he couldn't, they had grown too far apart during the years. They weren't able to understand each other anymore.  
Their daughters were already asleep, so he told her that he forgot something at the office and he left.

--

That night Samantha was reviewing some files at home when she heard someone knocking on her door. It was late and she wasn't expecting anyone.  
She took her gun and watched through the peephole. It was Jack.  
Surprised, she opened the door and let him in.

"Hi! Sorry, I didn't call before. I wanted to thank you for today"

"It's okay. We all have soft spots. You don't have to explain anything." Sensing his anxiety, she invited him to sit on her couch, and asked him if he wanted something to drink.

"Can I have something hard?"

Sam filled two glasses with scotch and sat near him.

Jack drank his scotch in one gulp and then tried to explain what had upset him about the case. He couldn't tell her his entire story, but opening up to her eased his burden. She listened without saying a word and put her hand on his thigh to calm him when he became emotional.

Samantha wanted to comfort him, he was talking with her about his feelings. He made reference to something that happened in his past, but he couldn't tell her what it was. She could see that it was something really painful for him. His eyes were watering while he was speaking. His voice was trembling. He was struggling to choose his words.  
He said that to solve cases like this was the reason he decided to remain working missing person. He had to save the boy. He needed another chance.  
She was confused. This last sentence could have a double meaning. She didn't want to push him, so she tried to be understanding. When he was ready, he would tell her.

Before leaving, he remembered that he had something in his pocket for her. He gave her the velvet box. Sam opened it and was speechless.  
"Don't say anything. Thanks and… Merry Christmas".  
Jack opened the door and went back home to his family.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: Guilt 

Jack passed an entire week at home with Maria and the kids for Christmas. Staying with his daughters helped to remind him why he loved his family so much. Hanna and Kate were his shadows and their contagious laughing made him forget about his job.

One night the entire family was watching TV together. Hanna was in his lap, and she asked him why he couldn't stay with them more. Maria looked at him, challenging him to answer.  
Jack kissed his daughter's head and told her that he had to help people to come back home when they lost their way.

She asked him: "_Daddy, if I get lost, will you find me, and then will you stay with me after_?"

Hanna could make him feel guilty; he put his work first, like his father. He swore that he would be different and surely he was more close to his daughters than his father had been with him, but they still missed him. He had failed.

Later that night Jack couldn't sleep.  
Why wasn't he sleeping? His wife and his daughters were just beyond a door, they were together. Even if he wasn't the most present father, he loved his girls and they knew it.  
Why did Maria always want to emphasize his flaws?  
He understood Hanna's question; she was a child and she couldn't totally understand his work schedule. But his wife knew better. She never lost any occasion to make him feel guilty. Every dinner or breakfast missed, every weekend on call or holiday ruined by a call was a reason to blame him. According to his wife, he should come back home every day with a smile on his lips. He played his role, maybe without the smile, and when he couldn't do it, he stayed at the office. And she was angry.  
She didn't understand how emotionally exhausting his job could be…  
In the past, he often would have a drink with Vivian after work, but lately he had found in Sam more than a friend.  
Hanna, Katie, Maria and Sam--these were the reasons for his sleepless nights. How could he keep all of them in his life without hurting someone?

--

At the office the situation was calm; nobody seemed to need the MPU's help, so it was time for boring paperwork.  
Samantha was at her desk and she found herself thinking of how much she had missed seeing Jack during the holiday**.** She hadn't been able to thank him for his gift and actually she didn't know that gift's real meaning.  
It wasn't a normal 'thank you gift'. He could give her flowers. It would have been simpler.  
Of course, she was attracted to her boss, and she wasn't indifferent to him, but he was married with two children. She never thought of herself as a family wrecker.  
The real problem was that she didn't feel safe anymore when she was around him. Jack was still married but now this wasn't enough to avoid her feelings any longer. She began this game not knowing exactly where it would have ended, but sure that she could have full control over her emotions.  
Now he had stunned her. She was confused. She gave up the control without being aware of it. Her feelings had grown during the time and now she feared she would be trapped.  
She was falling in love with this man.  
And Jack? She believed he loved his wife. But that gift and the way he gave it to her had changed everything.

Vivian didn't miss noticing that Samantha was playing with her necklace while she was looking at Jack's empty office. Viv was sure she never saw that chain before. Samantha was reserved about her private life, above all in the office, but at least Danny would have said something if there had been a boyfriend...  
The older woman was quite certain that the necklace was a gift from Jack.  
How far had they gone?  
Jack was one of her best friends and lately he seemed to be drained. She had tried to speak with him but he had always changed the subject.  
She knew that Jack and Samantha were connected and she had to admit that they worked very well together.  
Maybe she should talk to Samantha…

When Vivian saw the younger woman going to the breakroom, she went after her.

"I'll take a coffee, do you want any?" Samantha asked.

Vivian accepted and took a place at the table. Samantha sat down and gave the coffee to Vivian.

She was struggling with something on her left wrist. "Marcus bought me this watch for Christmas, but I need to have the strap adjusted. By the way, nice necklace…I'd have preferred something like that".

Vivian's voice was nonchalant, as if she wanted to chat.  
Samantha was all but naïve, and took a sip of her coffee while she decided how to answer.

If Vivian asked such a question, surely she knew something. So better be elusive and not invent any story: "Yeah... Thank you. Santa put it under my tree, probably because I've been good…"

Vivian knew when questioning was a waste of time, so deciding to wait for a better moment, she excused herself and returned to her desk.  
She promised herself to question Jack and shake some sense into him.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: There Is No Escape

Jack noticed that Sam didn't keep him company anymore when he stayed late at the office. Had his gift been too much? He could understand her. He was her older married boss, so why should she feel something for him?

_Yes, Jack, older married man… and what do you feel for her? __You are the married one. There are vows to respect…You have two daughters who missed you… __Instead you missed your young colleague…_

_  
_Lately his conscience was very loud. He was shaking his head when a knock at the glass door woke him up from his thoughts. Vivian was there and she asked if he wanted to have a drink with her.

"Sure. Like old times? Give me ten minutes." Jack replied.

Nick's Bar, their usual spot to drink, was three blocks away from the Federal Building. They buttoned-up their coats against the cold, sharp wind and didn't talk during the walk. When they arrived at Nick's, they sat at the bar and placed their orders.

Vivian began: "Jack, we are long-time friends, you know… I care for you and I'm worried. I'll go directly to the point. Is there something going on between you and Samantha?"

Jack was panicking inside. Then looking at Vivian's eyes, he honestly answered: "_I don't know_."

The woman was impressed by Jack's answer; he seemed conflicted. The situation was worse than she had thought. Jack's crisis was profound.  
"And Maria? How do you feel about her? She's your wife. I know that our job his hard and stressful, but you have a family to whom you should turn for support . Don't take the easy way out… Having a family is a huge responsibility. You have two wonderful girls, and you love them. Don't ruin all you have built during the years… Samantha is young, she is available and, I can't deny it, you seem to understand each other very well. But work isn't all. You don't share a past. You and Maria have grown together…"

…_but we took opposite directions during the way…  
_All that Vivian was saying was true. But… There was a _but_. Vivian wasn't at their home when he and Maria argued about anything or when she accused him of loving his work more than her. He was the neglectful husband and absent dad. They had been happy in the past. When Hanna was born, he was the happiest and most frightened man in the world. He and Maria had really created a family. Then their jobs took control over their lives. When Kate was born, there were already problems that became overwhelming when he began to lead his own unit. Now he couldn't find any support in Maria. She was completely absorbed by her role of mother and her full-time job. She wanted a husband but she couldn't be a wife. She hadn't the time for that. He didn't blame her because it was his fault. He always kept her at arm's length concerning his job. She couldn't read his mind. _But someone else could… _Did he love his wife? Yes. So why was he looking elsewhere for support?

Vivian was still speaking. "…Maria loves you, Jack. Don't give up. Don't help her to leave you. I know that this is not my business…"

"Yeah, you're right. I know you care, _but it really isn't your business_." Jack stared at Vivian, then he put the money on the bar and silently grabbed his coat and left.

--

Samantha was at home thinking about how her short lived marriage ended. They were too young. There wasn't any grudge. But if they had had children, would it have been so simple? Definitely not. She didn't want children. They needed a family and she didn't believe she could trust a man to help her raise a child. Men weren't trustworthy. She believed Jack was different, but the gold necklace made her question that belief. She had seen in him a role model, a mentor. But he was only a man. And she was falling in love with him. But she couldn't love him; he was unavailable. The wall that she so carefully built around her was cracking. But for now she was still safe; he had a family. She invited him into her life, but she knew that it could be only a part-time presence. Now he was starting to take control. She needed to have some distance from him. That was the only way she knew to avoid getting hurt.

--

A new case was waiting for the team when they arrived at the office. Jack presented the facts as they knew them and then he assigned the tasks. Vivian and Danny went to the missing person's work place, he went to the family and Sam stayed at the office to do background checks.

Sam was relieved she wasn't going with him.

When he came back, he asked if there was some news. While she was telling him what she had found out, his phone rang. It had to be a new important lead because his mood changed as he wrenched the pen from Sam's hands and scribbled on a piece of paper.

"Samantha, collect your things. We must take the first flight to Seattle. Take your overnight bag with you. We'll meet in the parking lot in 30 minutes." And he went to his office.

A/N: Big thanks to Diane for her hard work in fixing my many errors!


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six: Revelations

Samantha went into the bathroom and, looking at her reflection in the mirror, took a deep breath. Jack would have seen her only in 'work mode'. She was determined not to show any vulnerabilities. In this way she could avoid any personal reference. She had to calm down. They had always worked very well together. Now she had only to forget that she would be alone with him 2000 miles from home…

--

During the six-hour flight Jack and Samantha reviewed all the information about the case.

Michael Larson, an attorney, 43 years old, was married without children. After a dinner with a client he hadn't come back home to Scarsdale. His wife had called the police when she had awakened in the morning and he wasn't there. Jack and Samantha were going to Seattle to follow a lead. One of the missing man's colleagues told Vivian that he had overheard a private phone call three days before Larson's disappearance. He didn't know with whom his colleague was speaking, but he could say that the tone was worried. Checking the missing person's phone calls, they discovered he was speaking with someone who was using a public phone, which was in the parking lot of a private clinic in Seattle. They found out that he probably used a chartered plane under a false name to reach that city. His wife was of no help to them . They seemed to be not very close.

Reading the files, Jack remembered his interview with Larson's wife. She had seemed more worried about the tennis lesson that she would have lost than her husband's disappearance. They were married, but they lived two separate lives. The fact that they hadn't had any children maybe had been a factor in their estrangement. Or maybe not. He and Maria had two daughters but they weren't close anymore. He couldn't remember when it exactly started. At the beginning they had a strong bond, but then their lives started to diverge. Today he felt that their children were the only link that let their marriage survive.

When the two agents arrived in Seattle they hired a car and went to the clinic. As they parked in the lot near the public phone, they noticed security cameras. Jack was about to open his mouth when Samantha, looking above the phone, told him that maybe they could get some clue from the camera. Jack smiled. He didn't have to speak with Sam; their minds worked in the same way. They looked at the security tapes and they discovered that a woman had made the phone call. Nobody at the clinic seemed to remember the woman. Finding the woman on the tapes of the parking lot, they found a partial license plate. Samantha sent the stills to the office. Now they had only to wait.

It was getting late and they were both hungry and tired. They drove to the hotel near the clinic where Vivian had booked rooms for them. Their rooms where on two different floors.

Samantha breathed a sigh of relief; she was safe again.

Jack wondered if Vivian had expressly asked for rooms on different floors.

The hotel had a good restaurant and they were glad they did not have to go out in the Seattle rain.

Jack chose a table in a secluded corner. Samantha followed Jack hesitating, she didn't need a private area where he could stare at her for the entire dinner. In spite of that, when he pulled the chair out for her, she sat down.

They looked at the menu. It was full of delicious sounding local seafood. The cioppino sounded very good and Samantha was tempted to try it. But that atmosphere was more suitable for a romantic dinner. And surely she didn't want to give Jack that impression. So she chose something simple. Jack ordered the salmon special and then, finally, they looked at each other for the first time that day.

Samantha felt uncomfortable. They were alone and far from home. Nobody could judge them… Only they could control their actions and how could she keep from showing her true feelings? She couldn't avoid Jack forever.

Jack's eyes were demanding. He wanted an explanation about Sam's behaviour. Lately she seemed to be avoiding him. But he was frightened to ask. And did he have the right to ask? And, above all, was he ready for the answer? But instead, he brought up the gift.

"Sam, I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have given you that gift. I didn't want to give you the wrong impression. I made a mistake. You helped me and I…"

Jack was interrupted by Sam's determined voice: "No, stop it. I was wrong. I shouldn't have accepted it. You don't owe me anything. We are friends."

Jack wanted to reply but the waitress arrived with their plates, and they ate in silence.

During the short walk back to their rooms Jack was anxious. He really wanted to ask Samantha why she didn't stay with him anymore after work. It had become a soothing habit. He could go home more relaxed and face Maria's bitter remarks better. Now he missed all this. When the elevator arrived at Sam's floor, Jack followed her out. They arrived in front of her door.

Samantha felt that Jack wanted to speak about them. She wasn't ready. She couldn't tell him that she's falling in love and that she was frightened as a teenager with her first love. He was married and he was her boss. She COULDN'T love him. But looking into his eyes, she couldn't hide her feelings. He could read her so easily. She felt naked.

Jack's deep stare was on her. "Sam, are we only friends?"

"Don't ask me this. We can't be anything else."

Jack's trembling hand was on her cheek. She covered it with hers, lingering on the feel of his hand on her, and then backed away. She lowered her head and, saying goodnight to him, walked into the safety of her room.

She went to the window and looked outside. It was raining again. She could see how one could get easily depressed in that climate. Sam's emotions was as unsettled as the Seattle sky on that night. She had to find a way out before working with Jack became too overwhelming. She looked at the clock. It was almost 10 p.m. She could make a phone call. She dialled the number before her brain could stop her.

"Samantha, the sexiest FBI agent that I know. What an honour! Have you changed your mind?" Eric Kellar' s voice answered.

She decided to accept his invitation for Friday night.

--

The next morning they received a name and an address from the office. The woman who owned the car that they saw on the security tape wasn't at home. A neighbour told the agents that before her husband left for a work trip, some days ago, they argued. It seemed a real fight. Then she went away with their son. She had a suitcase with her. He hadn't seen any of them since. They reached the husband; he was coming back home and he hadn't heard from his wife or his son since his departure. He confessed that he discovered she was betraying him. That fight was the last. He left her and he threatened to take the custody of their son.

Jack and Samantha began to visualize what could have happened. Larson and this woman were lovers. The woman's husband found out about the affair and told her he was going to take their son away. She phoned Larson for help. He flew to Seattle and he probably met with her somewhere. They were not taken against their wills. Jack decided to inform the local FBI missing person's unit. The son was a kidnap victim, but this was Seattle's case now. The NY office was no longer involved.

--

On the flight back, Jack was thinking about the case. How could a parent take away his child from his family and all he knew? He understood that the mother was frightened, but the child needed his father as much as he needed her. _No matter how bad things could get between him and Maria, she would never take the kids away from him. _He was sure of this. They were, first of all, a family.

He hadn't noticed that Samantha had fallen asleep against his shoulder. Jack looked over at her. He no longer saw the tough FBI agent under his command. What he saw was a beautiful, intriguing woman and he _wanted_ her.

--

**N/A**: huge thanks to Sharon for helping me keeping the story on track!  
And please, if you like it or dislike it, leave me a review, I need to improve... I need your help! :)


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven: New Life

Samantha was on her couch, surfing through the TV channels without paying much attention to what was on the screen. Her answering machine had already taken three messages from Eric. He wanted to go out for a drink together, but she wasn't in the mood. They had already gone out three times and the last two had ended in her apartment.

She has known Keller since her arrival in NY. They have been in and out of a relationship for some time and she couldn't deny that he was an attractive man. But… she couldn't enjoy his company. She was distracted by every man in his forties with an imperceptible resemblance to Jack. She took Eric home because she had to prove to herself that she could regain the control over her life. But now she seriously doubted her capacities.

--

The following morning Eric sent her a bunch of flowers. Danny immediately stole the little envelope that was with the flowers and read it aloud. It contained a dinner invitation to an expensive restaurant for the night.

Vivian, who was sipping her coffee at the meeting table, turned her attention toward the reader. She was curious; it was so rare to be able to discover something about Samantha's private life. Samantha was trying to retrieve her invitation, but Danny was using his body to prevent her from succeeding.

"Children!" Jack's joking voice interrupted their game. He looked at Vivian for an explanation and she pointed at the bunch of flowers on Sam's desk. Looking at the flowers, Jack told Samantha: "Your suitor certainly doesn't mind how much he's spending…" And then he stared at her for what she thought was an eternity. Samantha felt uncomfortable.

When Jack decided that he had achieved his purpose, he laid their new missing person's file on the meeting table. Really it wasn't a new case. The Chicago police asked for their help to find a woman who had disappeared four years earlier during a trip to NY. There was a new lead and Van Doren asked Jack to follow it up, as a favor. Jack assigned the tasks and then went into his office.

In the afternoon the team was sharing the information that they had collected. There was a reliable lead.

Samantha was searching on her computer when she found a police report: "Jack, you may want to look at this"

Jack looked at Sam's computer screen from behind her shoulders and, without being aware of it, he sniffed her perfume. He noticed how different it was from Maria's. Vivian didn't fail to notice.

A woman matching the missing person's description had been in a very bad car accident and now she was in critical condition at the Thomas Jefferson University Hospital in Philadelphia. She hadn't any identification. Jack looked at the flowers again and then he told Danny to be ready in 30 minutes.

Vivian again noticed Jack's behavior. He was definitely jealous. Lately Jack and Samantha had gone beyond the friendship limits. They often invaded each other spaces, and it was not very professional. Vivian had seen more than once their longing looks and subtle touches. He was Samantha's boss; what was he thinking? Did he want to lose his job?

--

Jack phoned Samantha from the hospital saying that the case was solved. The car accident had really helped them to solve the case because the woman had joined a cult. Nobody had suspected that outcome. During her trip to NY, she had probably met someone who had persuaded her to change her life.

It was late and Vivian decided to go back home to her family; the case was closed and her colleagues didn't need her. She was waiting for the elevator when her phone rang. It was Jack's wife. Jack was out of town with Danny and probably they would have been back before midnight. Why was Maria calling her?

Maria wanted to know where her husband was, because he had promised to be home early to help Hanna. Knowing how intense he had been that afternoon, Vivian tried to take responsibility for Jack's neglectful behavior.

"It's my fault. Jack told me to inform you about his being late, but I had to catch up on a lead and I forgot. I'm really sorry."

Maria's cold voice replied: "And he obviously hadn't a minute to talk with his daughter… Work always comes first"

When Vivian closed the conversation, she was mad at Jack. She had just lied to his wife, and, besides that, she had taken upon herself his fault. He had said that it wasn't her business, but he was making it her business… Concerning work she would pass through the fire for him, but his personal life was another thing. Looking at what was happening at the office, she believed that sooner or later she would have to cover for him and Samantha, and she wasn't going to do it. They probably hadn't slept together yet, but it was merely a question of time. She had tried to shake some sense into him, but he had pushed her away. Speaking with Samantha was futile; she had made it clear that she didn't want any intrusion in her private life.

Jack and Danny came back to the office and they found Samantha filling out some documents. Her phone rang. She looked at the ID but didn't answer. Danny collected his things and didn't miss the occasion to tease Samantha about her date.

"Poor guy, he thinks he has a chance… He doesn't know that you use men and then you spit them out!"

Samantha remained alone in the office thinking about Danny's words.

Was Danny right? Did she really use men? Why shouldn't she? She felt men used her. She couldn't trust them; they had only disappointed her. But, deep inside her, she wanted to believe that somewhere there was a man who was different. Maybe she was a romantic girl. No, Samantha Spade couldn't be romantic. She never believed in the 'knight in his shining armour' who could save her. She believed more in the Boogie Man and in the strength you had to find in yourself to defeat him. That had been her life. She wasn't strong, but she'd had to wear a mask since she was fourteen years old. She had to continue not to trust men, even if it meant being alone. No man could be trusted; no man would save her.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight: Awareness

Jack went home, disappointed. Samantha and Danny joked about her date for that night, and Jack did not find it funny at all. He was wondering if he was jealous. But he had no right to be…and he couldn't act on it. He was angry with himself because he had put himself in that situation. He was her boss, what would he have wanted? A relationship with her could jeopardize both their careers.

Maria was waiting for him in the kitchen, and he could see she was ready for another fight. That night she would have had a good opponent, but he did not need more stress.

"You're late. Hanna waited for you until 10. The recital is tomorrow; don't forget. You promised her you would help her to go through her part again."

"I'm sorry. But you know how my job is. We were following an important lead and I couldn't just walk away"

"Yeah, yeah… you always must follow something… are you sure that the lead you were following wasn't a woman?"

"People's lives depend on my work. If you can't understand that, believe what you want."

Jack took his jacket and left.

Samantha was still in the office. She had phoned Keller to decline his invitation. He had sent her the flowers with an invitation, but she knew she was just leading him on because she could not get Jack out of her mind. He was married, but loving a married man wasn't a crime. Even though she could see Jack was conflicted, he could not hide his feelings. She had felt his eyes on her all day. Why did she have to fight against her feelings. When it comes to Jack, she has become defenceless. Was she ready to trust a man?

While driving back to the office, Jack wondered when his marriage started breaking. What had happened to their lives? He and Maria had become so angry with each other. Maria always seemed to want more than he could offer. She was unhappy and she thought that it was only his fault. He couldn't give her what she needed; he couldn't share his life with her anymore. Maybe she was right – it was his fault. He found someone who could ease his pain. Why did he have to hold on?

Because he was married. With a woman who probably hated him. And blamed him for everything was happening in the world. Jack could hear a sarcastic voice in his brain:_ yeah, Jack, you really have to hold on… you could__lose a frigid bitch… _

The security guard at the Federal Building entrance greeted Jack and asked if there was some important case. Jack answered that he had only forgotten something upstairs.

Jack arrived at the 12th floor and, walking down the corridor toward his office, he looked out toward the bullpen. Sam's desk lamp was still on. He stopped to watch her. What is about her that soothes him? Just knowing she was there eased his stress.

She sat at her desk with her head bent over the back of the chair. Her blond hair was flowing down and her hands were on her face. She had to be very tired.

He approached her desk. The flowers were still there. "I thought you had a date with that police officer… What is his name?..."

Samantha hadn't heard Jack approaching. She jumped a little and then she turned toward him. "Keller. I changed my mind" Samantha was confused. She had been getting mixed signals from Jack from the beginning. The way he looked at her, the slight touch of his hand, the attention he gave her… What did he really feel for her?

"You see each other often…?" Jack was moving his hand unconsciously like he was cleaning a spot off her desk and the other hand was on the back of her chair.

Samantha stood up, forcing him to give her some space and harshly asked: "Jack, what's the point? Why are you here? You should be home with your family"

"You're right, I should. But I'm here. And you, why are you here?"

Sam could not hold back any longer. "I know that it is useless continuing a relationship with him when there is another man."

Jack looked at her. His eyes questioning and hopeful at the same time.

She approached him and, looking into his eyes, leaned forward and kissed him. Sam was relieved. She had finally given in to her feelings. But she was afraid to wait for his reaction. "I'm sorry, Jack. Goodnight".

Jack stood there, stunned, not able to move or talk as Sam walked away.


	9. Chapter 9

This is the last chapter. Thanks are due to all the readers, and a special thanks to all of you that took the time to leave or send me a review. As always, HUGE thanks to Diane, who patiently corrected my story, and to Sharon who helped me through this every day with suggestions and encouragements. I enjoyed this 'adventure' and I hope you will like this ending.

Buona lettura!

--

Chapter Nine: Unavoidable 

Jack was in his office, reviewing in his mind what had happened. The last 24 hours had been an emotional roller coaster.

Sam had kissed him. He was still stunned. He let her just walk away; he couldn't speak. He was going to follow her; she was probably still in her car. But the phone rang. Could it be her? He picked up the phone to hear Olczyk's voice. A child had gone missing.

An eight-year-old boy disappeared from his hotel room. Jack immediately called Samantha, as she was the one who could intervene more quickly. The boy had been kidnapped by a waiter, raped and killed in less than five hours, but it took them almost twenty hours to find the corpse. The security tapes showed how the waiter escaped with the child. But it was difficult to identify the kidnapper because he had used a false name. They wasted a lot of time searching for his real identity. When they finally found him, it took another five hours to make him confess and tell the investigators where he had hidden the body.

Jack was at his desk, second-guessing his choices. Did he make any mistakes? Could different choices have saved the boy? Maybe he could have found the kidnapper earlier. Had he been concentrating on the case, or on Sam? He knew that he could do his job better. All day it had been difficult to focus on the investigation… In addition to that, when he phoned Maria to tell her that he couldn't go to Hanna's recital, her reaction had been worse than he thought. She told him that he didn't have to hurry home because they would not be there. Maria was taking the girls to her parents for the weekend. Once again he had failed his family. He had broken another promise to his daughter.

When a case has ended so badly, he needed to find solace in his family, but they didn't understand his job and the emotions that came with it. When he needed his family, they were not there for him… But, really, when was he there for them? Was Maria right? Was his job more important than his family? He was a failure as a father, his daughters deserved better… He felt that he was not worthy of their love.

Samantha had remained alone in the bullpen. She had watched Vivian stare at the picture of her son all afternoon. All Vivian wanted to do was to go home and hug Reggie. Danny had been uncharacteristically quiet and left without saying goodbye. In the past he would have found solace in a bottle, but where would he find it now? That night Samantha couldn't help him; she might drown the pain in a bottle herself…

Sam had chosen the FBI because she believed she could make a difference. And, the Missing Person Unit had become important to her. The lost deserved to be found. But, the death of a child always made her question her choices. She knew the desperation that could cause a person to disappear; she had done it herself when she was a teenager. But, she also remembered the relief she felt when her mother came looking for her. She believed her mother knew there were problems, but she had chosen to pretend they did not exist. Maybe she only had not known how to face them. Knowing someone cared enough to find them gave the lost another chance. But where was another chance for a boy that had been kidnapped, raped and murdered? If she could, she would kill the man who did it. Samantha felt robbed; that man had stolen her chance to save that boy.

She knew that bad things sometimes happen to good people, but no books, no seminars could have prepared her for what she had dealt with that day. She felt shattered, and how could she face the night alone? She usually could take care of herself and her problems; since her childhood she had learned not to need anyone. She was tough. But that night was different, she needed someone who would understand, with whom she could share her feelings and emotions. Her eyes scanned the bullpen, then she looked over at Jack's office. He was at his desk. Would it be so wrong if she asked for his help?

Just when Jack had decided to sleep on the couch in his office, instead of returning to an empty house, Samantha appeared at his door.

"Jack, I'm going home."

She hesitated and Jack could see that she needed comfort. Her eyes were red and she seemed defeated. It was at a time like this that he knew he had to support and comfort his team. His own experience over the years made him very aware of the affects of a sad case.

"Sam, would you like to have a drink? We can talk."

She accepted. She didn't know if it was right or wrong, but at that point it didn't matter anymore.

She needed him. He was the only one who could help her handle the pain that came with finding people dead. He understood. He could see through her façade; she wasn't a tough FBI agent in that moment. She felt like a little girl frightened to face the world alone. She needed that '_knight in shining armor' _in who she had never believed. She decided to have faith in a dream, even if it would be for only a night.

Jack chose a bar that was near Samantha's apartment. The choice didn't go unnoticed. They walked closer than two colleagues should. Sam felt more than one time Jack's hand on her back. His touch was light and hesitant. Jack's presence had been able to distract her from her thoughts about the case.

She could feel Jack was getting closer to her. Was he ready? She knew he was giving in, and he only needed a little 'push'.

The bar was very crowded and they were forced to sit very close to each other, and they kept moving closer to each other to hear over the noise.

Their proximity made Jack constantly aware of her light perfume. He was becoming used to it. He was amazed by the ease of their conversations and by the sense of happiness that was starting to invade him. Jack realized he didn't want to be anywhere else. In trying to forget the events of the day, they probably drank more that they meant to, but despite this, Jack looked at his empty glass and ordered another round. He wasn't ready to leave.

"Your wife is waiting for you." Sam was smiling, but she really wanted to understand what his intentions were.

"No, she has gone away with the girls." Jack glanced at Sam to see her reaction.

Sam finished her drink in one gulp and, looking directly into his eyes, said: "It's getting late. How about walking me home?"

Jack was not sure that he was reading her intentions correctly. Could he hope that he was right? He put the money on the table and followed her out.She was waiting for him just outside the bar door. She gave him a friendly kiss on his cheek. Jack was wondered if he could still recognise when a woman was flirting with him. He was bewildered; what was she expecting from him? Was she playing with him?

Samantha, looking at Jack's confused expression, smiled and then she took his hand and, leading the way, started toward her apartment building.

Walking hand in hand, Jack's loneliness gave way to a feelings of comfort and companionship that he had not felt for many years. When they stopped at the corner, Sam turned and kissed him again. It wasn't just a friendly kiss…she was asking for something more. The game was over. No misunderstanding left.

Jack drew back and, looking deeply into her eyes, asked her: "Sam, is this what you really want?"

"How long are you going to avoid your feelings?" Her gaze was challenging him.

The traffic light changed and they crossed the street. As they walked, he realized she was right - he could no longer deny his feelings. He wanted her. He followed her trying to remember exactly how far it was to her building. He was in a daze. He was an adult who felt like a teenager waiting to score on his first date.What was happening? What was he doing in Sam's building? He knew what was coming.

Sam was fumbling to unlock the door. She backed into her apartment, pulling Jack in with her.

Her actions reminded him of his first dates with Maria. This made Jack hesitate. He drew back. What were they doing? What was he thinking?

Samantha was aware of the sudden change in his behaviour. She was looking at him, trying to read his thoughts and waiting for the right moment.

He turned to leave.

"Jack." Sam's voice stopped him.

"I don't want to hurt you. I'm no good at this. I'm no good for you."

"Let me be the judge of that. I trust you."

"No," he said as he walked toward the door again. He stopped again.

Sam's hand was on his arm, pulling him toward her. "Jack, I need you."

Jack stepped back until he found the hard surface of the door against his back. He knew he should leave but he couldn't. How could he resist? He needed her too.

Sam reached out to him again. While she was playing with the lapels of his jacket, her mischievous look was on him.

"I'm your boss," he said.

"Yes, you are," and she opened his jacket

"I'm married..," he said, trying feebly to stop her.

"Yes, you are," and she loosened his tie and pulled it away.

"I'm much older than you," he said, starting to help her.

"Yes, you are," and she unbuttoned his shirt.

While he was saying "I'm not going to do this…"

…she put her hands on his chest and added, "Yes, you are…," and her lips were on his.

His arms tightened around her and he finally gave in.

"Yes, I am…" Jack whispered against her lips, before kissing her passionately.

And, so it began.


End file.
